MY NOTE TO LEAH

Hi Leah.

Thanks for staying at our house and looking after our beloved felines for us. We both feel very comfortable leaving them in your hands. I just want to briefly go over a few things for you to keep in mind. As you know, there are seven of them on the shelf resting comfortably and for all eternity in their urns. If you wouldn’t mind, when you get up in the morning, just go over to them, acknowledge them by name and read them today’s weather forecast. I now it sounds crazy, but they seem to like it as I remember them spending endless hours sitting on the windowsills peering out, and of course, screaming at the birds to get off the lawn. Thank you.

As far as feeding goes, they eat every 3 hours but, if you forget, don’t worry; one of them will remind you by unloading a hairball at your feet. It’s like clockwork, really.

Just one more thing: you only have to brush them a couple of times a day: once after breakfast and one time before they go to bed for the night after you give them their bath. The hair dryer is on the bathroom counter. Thank you.

Oops, sorry, I forgot something. All three sleep on the right hand side of the bed as you’re facing it. Bean sleeps closest to the edge. I know this sounds crazy but before you tuck them in, would it be possible for you to read The Chicago Cubs box score to them. For some reason they can’t fall asleep without it. Weird, I know. If the Cubs happen to be off that day, just read the previous days box score. They’re cats, they won’t know the difference. The left side of the bed is all yours, for the most part.

Taddio poops…a lot and it’s rather aromatic, if you know what I mean. You’ll know because your eyes will start to tear up as he races out of there and sprints upstairs. Please change litter box immediately in order to save the little paint that’s still on the walls in the litter box room. Thank you for doing that.

Well, that should about do it, I think. I may try to give you a call just to see how it’s going. Does 9AM, noon, 3 o’clock and 7 work for you? I’m sure it’ll be fine but I just like to check in.

Okay, almost forgot. If you should happen to oversleep in the morning, you’ll need to know that the Band Aids are in the bathroom cabinet. We’ve got gauze in there as well. Here’s hoping you won’t need any of it. Nah, you won’t oversleep. You’re good.

Oh my gosh, very important. Friday is ‘Pizza night.’ They LOVE, LOVE, LOVE double anchovies but can deal with pepperoni in a pinch.

Thanks again for doing this, Leah. I’ll call you…a lot.

Bob

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